Episode 1: Lard Of The Dance
Air Date: Aug 23, 1998
A sophisticated, intelligent new girl named Alex Whitney comes to Springfield Elementary and threatens to overshadow Lisa. Alex is even a hit with Principal Skinner, who lets her organize a school dance. Meanwhile, Homer comes up with a new get-rich-quick scheme: He and Bart will round up as much grease as they can and sell it to a rendering plant. They target the richest source imaginable: the Springfield Elementary cafeteria kitchen. Lisa goes to the dance, but sells tickets outside the gym because she couldn't find a date. At the same time, Homer has crawled through the school's air ducts and into the kitchen, where he uses his wet-dry vac to suck grease out of the stove. But Groundskeeper Willie appears on the scene and tries to prevent the theft. One thing leads to another, and as a result of a misplaced wet-dry vac the school's air ducts fill with the stove's contents. Alex's event is interrupted when the oil begins to drip through the gym ceiling, but no matter--the children of Springfield are happy to frolick in the grease. Lisa is pleased to see her friends acting like kids again and breaks down Alex's uppity facade by goading her into a grease fight.
Episode 2: The Wizard Of Evergreen Terrace
Air Date: Sep 20, 1998
Homer quits his job and becomes an inventor. Setting up a tinkering shop in the basement, he sets for himself the modest goal of inventing more stuff than the prolific Thomas Edison. Homer comes up with some incredible new inventions, like an electronic hammer, a reclining chair with a built-in toilet, and a rifle that shoots make-up at women's faces. One of his creations, a chair with two extra feet that lets you lean way back, seems to be very popular. When Homer realizes that his six-legged chair was actually already invented by Edison, he takes his trusty electronic hammer and goes to the Edison Museum to smash the original, which is inside a replica of Edison's workshop. While there, Homer realizes that Thomas Edison was also working in the shadow of a great man: Leonardo Da Vinci. Homer feels a deep kinship with Edison and decides not to destroy the six-legged chair. Later, when authorities find the electronic hammer, which Homer forgot, in Edison's workshop, the deceased inventor gets credit for yet another amazing creation. Homer is furious.
Episode 3: Bart The Mother
Air Date: Sep 27, 1998
When Bart is hanging out with Nelson, he accidentally kills a bird sitting in her nest. Seeing that the bird has left behind two perfect eggs, Bart is overcome with guilt and takes it upon himself to hatch the baby birds. He keeps the eggs warm anyway he can, sometimes with a lightbulb, sometimes by sitting on them. Eventually the eggs hatch, but there are no birds inside. Instead two nasty-looking lizards emerge. Confused by what happened, Bart and Marge take the lizards to the Springfield Birdwatching Society and ask them why the lizards were inside the bird's nest. Principal Skinner, a member of the Society, explains that the lizards are Bolivian tree lizards, a species that steals bird's eggs and leave their own eggs to be watched after by the mother bird. Skinner wants to kill the lizards since they're bad for the ecosystem, but Bart flees with his lizards and sets them free. The lizards go on to eat all of Springfield's pigeons.
Episode 4: Treehouse Of Horror IX
Air Date: Oct 25, 1998
In this year's gruesome grouping of Halloween gore, Homer gets a killer new hairdo, Lisa and Bart discover first-hand that TV violence is bad, and Maggie gets her first tooth and a glimpse of her real father. In the first segment, Homer's brain is taken over by Snake when he gets Snake's hair in a transplant. With Snake controlling him, Homer kills Apu and Moe and then sets his sights on Bart. Luckily, Chief Wiggum saves the day by busting a cap in the evil hair piece. In the second story, Bart and Lisa get sucked through the fourth wall into the land of Itchy and Scratchy in the cartoon world. At first it's all fun and games, but when Itchy and Scratchy try to kill the two Simpson kids, their only escape is through Homer's inept flipping of channels. As they flip through the dial, Bart and Lisa wind up in the most frightening place of all: Live with Regis and Kathie Lee. In the final segment, the appearance of Maggie's first tooth leads to a confession Marge never wanted to make: Homer is not Maggie's real father. Kang, the drooling alien, actually inseminated Marge. Now Kang is back and he wants his baby. Homer and Marge refuse to give Maggie up. There's only one thing for the two parties to do: Go on The Jerry Springer Show and fight it out on national television.
Episode 5: When You Dish Upon A Star
Air Date: Nov 8, 1998
Homer befriends superstar couple Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger and becomes their personal assistant. But when he spills the beans about the celebrities living in Springfield, who also include Ron Howard and Brian Grazer, the entire town sets up camp outside the gates of their mansion. Alec and Kim fire Homer as their assistant. Homer gets revenge by revealing everything he has learned about them to the world. The conflict escalates into a high-speed car chase, during which Ron Howard is injured and Homer is eventually caught. A judge places a restraining order on Homer and he is forced to remain 500 miles away from all celebrities.
Episode 6: D'oh-in' In The Wind
Air Date: Nov 15, 1998
During a search for his roots, Homer meets Seth and Munchie, two aging hippies who lived on a rural commune with his mother. Inspired by their example and memories of his freewheeling mother, Homer becomes a flower child. After accidentally sabotaging their natural juice business, Homer tries to make it up to them by picking an entire crop of vegetables and making a whole new batch of juice himself. It turns out that Homer picked the wrong crop and has bottled a powerful blend of hallucinogens that drugs all of Springfield. When the police catch wind of what's going on, they raid Seth and Munchie's farm and Homer gets shot during the melee. Luckily, his only injury is a flower embedded in his head.
Episode 7: Lisa Gets An A
Air Date: Nov 22, 1998
A sick-day puts Lisa in a difficult academic predicament: She wants to do her best on a reading test, but didn't study at all when she was home. After consulting with Bart, she reluctantly decides to buy the test answers from Nelson and scores a perfect A+++. But when her high test score raises Springfield Elementary School's average and earns the troubled school a huge state grant, Lisa is plagued with guilt. Meanwhile, Homer grows attached to a lobster that he brought home for dinner, naming it Mr. Pinchy. When Lisa admits that she cheated to Principal Skinner, he is disheartened but still wants to keep the grant money. Skinner and Chalmers trick Lisa into thinking that she's turned down the school's grant, but secretly keep the cash. Back at home, Homer loses his beloved new pet when he gives it a hot bath. Heartbroken but hungry, Homer bids farewell to his crustacean friend by eating it.
Episode 8: Homer Simpson In: Kidney Trouble
Air Date: Dec 6, 1998
When Homer refuses to pull the car over and let Grampa go to the bathroom, the old man's kidneys explode. Out of guilt, Homer agrees to donate one of his kidneys to his father. But just before the operation, Homer, fearing he won't survive, flees the hospital and hops aboard a boat headed to an unknown destination. On the boat, he meets a group of lost souls who accept him until he reveals that he left his sick father waiting for a kidney. The lost souls throw Homer overboard and he realizes that he must go through with the transplant. As luck would have it, Homer gets run over by a car on the way to the hospital. When he wakes up in a hospital bed, he discovers that not only has he broken all of his limbs, but Dr. Hibbert has removed his kidney and given it to Grampa.
Episode 9: Mayored To The Mob
Air Date: Dec 20, 1998
When Homer saves Mayor Quimby and Star Wars star Mark Hamill's lives during a sci-fi convention riot, the Mayor hires him as his personal bodyguard. Following Quimby around, Homer has to turn a blind eye to his new boss' corruption and bribe-taking. But when Homer learns that Quimby has allowed Fat Tony to supply Springfield Elementary with rats' milk, he confronts the Mayor and demands that the deal be broken. Quimby calls off the deal, but in doing so becomes a target for Fat Tony and his henchmen. When hitman Louie tries to kill the Mayor during a performance of Guys and Dolls (starring, coincidentally, Mark Hamill), Homer attacks the assailant and stops him. While Homer makes Quimby safe from Louie, Fat Tony takes the opportunity to beat the mayor repeatedly with a baseball bat.
Episode 10: Viva Ned Flanders
Air Date: Jan 10, 1999
In an attempt to show Flanders a good time, Homer takes him to Las Vegas, where they gamble and drink. After a night of debauchery, the men wake up in a hotel room to discover that they've married Amber and Ginger, two trashy but sweet cocktail waitresses from Nero's Palace. Over a breakfast buffet, Homer and Ned try to explain to the women that they already have wives, but the brides prove to be frighteningly tenacious. Homer and Ned are forced to flee Las Vegas when everyone, from hotel security to the Moody Blues, beats them up for dishonoring two young women in need.
Episode 11: Wild Barts Can't Be Broken
Air Date: Jan 17, 1999
Homer and his buddies start a riot after the Springfield Isotopes win the league championship. Thinking the destruction is the fault of the town's youth, the authorities impose a curfew for everyone under a certain age. The children of Springfield rebel by starting a pirate radio station and broadcasting a show called We Know All Your Secrets, in which their parents' most private peccadilloes are revealed. When the adults realize the kids are behind the broadcasts, the two groups confront one another in song and dance. Eventually, the senior citizens arrive and insitute another curfew that keeps the grown-ups inside, too.
Episode 12: Sunday, Cruddy Sunday
Air Date: Jan 31, 1999
Homer meets a travel agent named Wally Kogen who offers to send him to the Super Bowl for free if he can sign up all of his friends for a special travel package. Homer convinces Moe, Barney, Lenny, Carl, Kirk Van Houten and a bunch of other guys to sign up. All the men pile into a bus Wally furnishes for the trip and drink their way to Miami for the game. When they get there, however, they discover that the tickets Wally sold them were counterfeit. Homer devises a plan to get them into the game, but they all wind up in a holding cell beneath the stadium and nearly miss the Super Bowl. The only person who can spring them is Wally's old friend Dolly Parton. Free from their cell, the group invades a high-class skybox owned by Rupert Murdoch. When Murdoch arrives, he has his guards attack the group. Fleeing Murdoch's guards, Homer and his friends crash the field and then the winning team's locker room, where they each get their own Super Bowl ring.
Episode 13: Homer To The Max
Air Date: Feb 7, 1999
When he finds out that a character on the TV show Police Cops is named Homer Simpson, the real Homer decides to change his name to Max Power. The new name earns him new, high-profile friends like Trent Steel, a young businessman. Steel invites Max and his wife Marge to a garden party, where they meet such luminaries as Ed Begley, Jr. and Bill Clinton. While Clinton tries to seduce Marge, Homer learns that the gathering is part of an effort to save the Springfield redwoods, and joins the protest. After chaining themselves to the giant trees, Max and his buddies are attacked by police. As he runs from the cops, Max accidentally pulls down the tree he's attached to, which in turn knocks down the entire forest. Humiliated, he retreats from his new friends and returns to being Homer Simpson.
Episode 14: I'm With Cupid
Air Date: Feb 14, 1999
When Apu finds increasingly elaborate ways of expressing his love for his wife, the men of Springfield feel as though they're being shown up in the romance department. Singer Elton John's arrival at the airport is the last straw--assuming he's in town at Apu's request, the Springfield men, led by Homer, kidnap John and lock him in a dog cage. Apu's real plan is to have a sky writer spell out his love for Manjula, but Homer also tries his best to foil the pilot's efforts. Eventually, John does sing for Manjula and everyone has a happy Valentine's Day.
Episode 15: Marge Simpson In: Screaming Yellow Honkers
Air Date: Feb 21, 1999
Homer buys a Canyonero, a giant all-terrain vehicle. At first he's excited about his new car, but when he discovers that the F-Series was made primarily for women, he gives it to Marge. Marge takes to the vehicle by becoming a more reckless, aggressive driver. While racing about town, she is busted for an illegal maneuver and must go to traffic school. But the classes turn out to be useless--Marge accidentally crashes the Canyonero into a prison and sets off a crime wave. When her license is revoked, Marge can only drive again when the police beg her to use the Canyonero to round up some stampeding rhinos who've escaped from the zoo. Marge saves the day, but wrecks the car as a result.
Episode 16: Make Room For Lisa
Air Date: Feb 28, 1999
When Homer agrees to allow an OmniTouch cellular phone tower to be placed on the roof of his house, Lisa begins to grow increasingly irritable. Seeking a solution to her tension and stomach aches, Homer takes her to a New Age store, where the salesperson recommends Sensory Deprivation. While resting in a tank full of water, Lisa has a series of visions that show her how much her father loves her. Homer, meanwhile, is in his own tank, which somehow drifts out of the store and sends him on an entirely different journey. When they each emerge from their deprivations, Lisa and Homer have a new understanding of their relationship and agree to spend more time together by going to the demolition derby.
Episode 17: Maximum Homerdrive
Air Date: Mar 28, 1999
When Homer accidentally causes the death of Red, a famous truck driver, he and Bart take over Red's truck to deliver his last load. While they're away, Marge and Lisa buy a new doorbell. On the road, Homer learns of a long-held trucker secret: All the trucks are controlled by an auto-drive system and the drivers just hang out as the trucks drive themselves. When Homer can't keep the secret, several angry truckers try to run him off the road and kill him for violating the code of silence. Meanwhile, Marge has troubles of her own when the new doorbell malfunctions and plays the Carpenter's Close to You over and over again. Homer escapes his attackers and brings Red's delivery to its destination. Returning home, he discovers a mob scene outsidehis house as everyone in town tries to stop the annoying doorbell. Only Senor Ding-Dong, the mysterious and debonair dean of doorbells, can stop it with his magic touch.
Episode 18: Simpsons Bible Stories
Air Date: Apr 4, 1999
A particularly boring sermon by Reverend Lovejoy sends each member of the Simpson family into his or her own biblical fantasy. Marge imagines herself and Homer as Adam and Eve, living in harmony with the flora and fauna of the Garden of Eden until Homer stupidly eats from the Tree of Knowledge. Lisa dreams of herself and the other kids of Springfield Elementary as the Israelites in ancient Egypt. Principal Skinner is Pharaoh and it's up to a nervous Milhouse to act as Moses and free his people from bondage. In Homer's dream, he is King Solomon, solving every dispute by cutting the contested object in half. When Lenny and Carl bring a pie to the King, he cuts it in half and eats both pieces. In Bart's action-packed fantasy, he is David, fighting Nelson as Goliath's son, Goliath II. When the Simpsons awake from their dreams, they discover that Revelation has come and it's time for God's final judgment. Only Lisa is allowed into Heaven, but Homer drags her down into Hell with the rest of the family.
Episode 19: Mom And Pop Art
Air Date: Apr 11, 1999
Homer becomes a conceptual artist, creating striking outsider art that catches the eye of Astrid Weller, a beautiful Springfield art dealer. Astrid arranges for Homer to have his own show, but when the Springfield elite gather for the opening, many are disappointed by his work. Homer decides that he must create something truly groundbreaking, so he floods the entire town, turning Springfield into an American Venice. His piece is a hit and everyone, including artist Jasper Johns, voices their approval.
Episode 20: The Old Man And The C Student
Air Date: Apr 25, 1999
Bart starts visiting Grandpa and the other old people at the Springfield Retirement Castle as part of a community service assignment. Meanwhile, he has bought thousands of springs for a project that never materializes. The boy tries to scare some life into the old codgers, but finds that they like passing their days peacefully. When he takes them all aboard a boat for a little adventure, the boat sinks and nearly kills them. Luckily, the boat bounces back up on a pile of springs Homer flushed down the toilet.
Episode 21: Monty Can't Buy Me Love
Air Date: May 2, 1999
When a popular, charming billionaire named Arthur Fortune opens a megastore in Springfield, Mr. Burns decides that he wants to be loved, too. With Homer's help, he comes up with a scheme to capture the Loch Ness Monster and bring it to Springfield. He succeeds in his mission, but accidentally causes a fire during the unveiling of the monster. Burns decides that he doesn't need to be loved and gets the monster a job working at a casino.
Episode 22: They Saved Lisa's Brain
Air Date: May 9, 1999
Lisa joins Mensa, the high I.Q. society. While there, she spends her time interacting with such geniuses as Dr. Hibbert, Professor Frink and the Comic Book Store Guy. By a twist of fate, the members of Mensa become the leaders of Springfield and try to remake the town in their geeky likeness. But the geniuses can't agree on anything and begin squabbling amongst themselves. It's up to the ultimate genius, Stephen Hawking, to intervene and set the smarty-pants straight.
Episode 23: 30 Minutes Over Tokyo
Air Date: May 16, 1999
After attending a Mega-Savings Seminar where they learn how to save money on everything, the Simpsons take a trip to Tokyo. While there, they lose all of their money and must enter a degrading game show called Happy Smile Super Challenge Family Wish Show to win tickets back to Springfield. After a series of increasingly cruel stunts meted out by the game show's host, Wink, the Simpsons win the tickets and return, a bit haggard, to the United States. On the way home, their plane is attacked by Godzilla.