Episode 1: Treehouse Of Horror Xiii
Air Date: Nov 3, 2002
1) SEND IN THE CLONES a " Homer gets a magic hammock that a copiesa himself and makes duplicate Homers. Things get out of hand when the army of Homer clones begins wreaking havoc in Springfield.
2) THE FRIGHT TO CREEP AND SCARE HARMS a " Lisa fights to have guns banned in Springfield when she sees how many tombstones in the cemeteries belong to shooting victims. Once Springfield complies, however, the town is rendered defenseless against the swarming hordes of gun-toting zombies who come back from the dead to seek revenge.
3) THE ISLAND OF DR. HIBBERT a " The Simpsons head for an island vacation hosted by Dr. Hibbert. Only once they arrive do they realize that hea 's gone mad and has taken to morphing his visitors (various Springfield residents) into manimals.
Episode 2: How I Spent My Strummer Vacation
Air Date: Nov 10, 2002
When Homer is secretly videotaped complaining about his family during an episode of a Taxicab Conversations,a they send him off to a rock and roll fantasy camp so that he can regroup and try to live his dream.
Once there, he lives the life of a rock star, as taught to him by the likes of Mick Jagger, Elvis Costello, Keith Richards, Brian Setzer, Tom Petty and Lenny Kravitz. When the camp ends after a week, Homer doesna 't want to leave. He just wants to rock.
Mick Jagger then invites Homer to come on stage for a benefit concert theya 're giving. Once on stage, Homer realizes that hea 's not a star, but just the groups Roadie. Homer decides to then wail on a guitar and introduce the band with a musical number of his own. Mick, Elvis, Keith, Tom, Lenny and Brian try to run Homer off stage and a riot breaks out at the venue.
In the end, the rockers apologize to Homer for their behavior and ask him to come on stage for another benefit concert. Homer declines however, saying that hea 's already the rock star of the Simpson family, so therea 's no need to go on stage any longer.
Episode 3: Bart Vs. Lisa Vs. 3rd Grade
Air Date: Nov 17, 2002
With the family tired of watching reality television, Bart suggests a satellite dish. Homer has an idea to raise money. Horse racing. Flush with cash, Homer buys a system. Watching hours upon hours of bad TV, Bart neglects to study for the Elementary School Achievement Test. He fails so badly that he gets dropped back to third grade. Meanwhile, Lisa does so well, she gets moved up to third grade.
Haven taken all the tests of third grade before, Bart excels. But Lisa struggles to catch up. On a field trip to Capital City, the class has a project to design a new state flag. Bart sabotages Lisa’s design, humiliating her in front of Governor Bailey. Bart and Lisa break into a fight and miss the bus back to Springfield.
Principal Skinner informs Homer and Marge that the kids are missing. Meanwhile, Bart and Lisa spend the night in the woods. A family of hillbillies comes across Bart and Lisa and drives them back to Capital City, where they’re reunited with Homer and Marge. Principal Skinner tells Bart and Lisa they should return to their respective grades to maintain the status quo.
Episode 4: Large Marge
Air Date: Nov 24, 2002
After winning a bet with Homer on the Dewey-Truman presidential election of 1948, Lisa gets to pick the day’s father-daughter activity. She chooses to help build houses for the homeless. After getting paint on his wedding ring, Homer takes it off. Two business women see Homer’s bare finger and take to him. Driving past the scene, Marge sees what she thinks is Homer flirting with the women. In fact, he’s explaining in detail how Marge gave birth to Bart.
Marge begins to worry that Homer isn’t as attracted to her. Manjula advises plastic surgery, and Marge goes under the knife for some liposuction. Waking up, she finds that the doctor accidentally gave her breast implants instead.
At first, Marge enjoys the attention and her new trade show modeling career. But she eventually tires of the leering and back spasms and gets the breasts removed.
Episode 5: Helter Shelter
Air Date: Dec 1, 2002
Walking through the plant, a section of pipe falls on Homer and damages his brain. Afraid he might sue, Burns offers him the company’s skybox tickets for a hockey game. The Simpsons enjoy the luxuries of high sports life, including sushi, hot tubs and massages. Annoyed with the classism, Lisa heads down to ice level to watch the game. She advises a Russian player on how to beat the goalie. He scores and gives her his stick in thanks.
At home, Homer nails Lisa’s stick above her bed. During the night, an army of termites pours out of the stick. In the morning, the family finds their house falling apart. An exterminator fumigates the house and tells the Simpsons the house is uninhabitable for six months. Homer decides to move everybody into a hotel. Finding every room in town sold out, the family moves in with Lenny. But he shares a wall with a jai alai court, so they move in with Comic Book Guy. But he freaks them out, so they move into a house on a reality program that simulates life in 1895.
The family has a rough time adjusting to the lack of modern day amenities, but Homer says they have to stick it out because they’re on TV. They begin to bond and enjoy their new, austere lives, which TV audiences find boring. The network execs decide a guest star is necessary to revive the show, so they send Squiggy from Laverne and Shirley into the house. That doesn’t do it, so the execs pick up the house with a crane attached to a helicopter and dump it into a fast moving river. Eventually, the house goes over a waterfall and washes up on shore. The Simpsons escape just before the house collapses.
Episode 6: The Great Louse Detective
Air Date: Dec 15, 2002
Homer comes in with the mail. He uses the George Foreman mail sorter to find out what’s good and what’s bad. The bad pile is then grilled into a patty, which Homer eats on a bun. In the good pile is an invitation for the family to spend a free weekend at Stagnant Springs Spa.
Marge enjoys a mud bath and neck massage from turtles. Homer ducks in for a steam. A mystery man sneaks by and turns the steam room thermostat from Invigorating to Murder, and bars the door shut with a wrench. Homer begins to sweat profusely, then passes out. Later, Krusty opens the door. A prune-like Homer falls out.
Episode 7: Special Edna (a.k.a. Love And Marking)
Air Date: Jan 5, 2003
Bart’s class is assigned a paper on World War I. Naturally, Bart procrastinates until the last second. He asks Grampa for help, but all Grampa can offer is a bizarre story about being a 4-year old in the trenches. Not surprisingly, Bart receives an F on the paper and has to stay after class to write a new one. Krabapple stays to watch him. Principal Skinner enters to take Edna away on their date. But then Agnes calls for help getting out of the tub. Skinner blows off Edna once again for his mother. Bart offers to take Edna out on the town. At home, Lisa wonders what happened to the Bart who put mothballs in the beef stew. Bart said he felt bad seeing Mrs. Krabapple so upset, apparently much like the time he invented her blind date, Woodrow. Lisa suggests Bart nominate Edna for Teacher of the Year to make her feel appreciated. During the press conference heralding Krabapple’s nomination, Cletus - from the Outhouse Times-Picayune - asks if Edna wins, will she leave her old life behind? Sensing trouble, Skinner begins to offer his tribute to Edna, but again blows her off after receiving an emergency page from Agnes.
The family joins Edna in Orlando, bored to be at EFCOT Center. Krabapple is lonely, but it turns out that Skinner has come down to be with her. Thing is, he brought Agnes along. Edna dumps him when she finds out.
Later, Skinner overhears that the winner of the teacher contest will win enough money to not have to ever teach again. Skinner wants to rig the contest so Edna doesn’t win, and he doesn’t lose her forever. Unsurprisingly, he enlists Bart’s help in pranking the contest. During the ceremony, Little Richard comes out as presenter of the Teacher of the Year award. To decide a winner, the three finalists are going to be asked one last question by the students that nominated them. Bart pretends that he can’t read the question because Edna never taught him to read. Skinner feels bad and pulls back the curtain on the whole sordid affair. Skinner says she should be Teacher of the Year since she taught him to love. He asks her to marry him, and she accepts. Next stop, a very special Simpsons wedding!
Episode 8: The Dad Who Knew Too Little
Air Date: Jan 12, 2003
Lisa is upset when she realizes that her own father doesna 't even know her very well. Ita 's even more evident when he fails to get her the birthday present she wanted. In an effort to get closer to her, Homer hires a detective to spy on Lisa and find out her likes-dislikes.
Lisa is impressed with Homera 's new detailed knowledge of her, but when Homer refuses to pay the detectivea 's bill, the guy tries to frame Lisa for a crime.
When the police arrive at the house, Lisa and Homer have to go on the run together, and Homer confesses to spying on his daughter. Lisa forgives him because she knows he did it out of love.
The police trace Homer and Lisa to a circus where Lisa uncovers clues to exonerate her.
Episode 9: The Strong Arms Of The Ma
Air Date: Feb 2, 2003
When Marge gets mugged, she becomes agoraphobic and cana 't leave the safety of her home. She holes up in the basement and starts working out on a weight set.
She gets stronger and stronger, enough so that shea 's able to re-enter the world and beat up the man who robbed her, but she takes it too far and becomes a steroid-crazed bully as she beefs up for the a Iron Maiden Fitness Pageant.
When Homer appeals to her to calm down, she finally relents and goes back to being the old Marge.
Episode 10: Pray Anything
Air Date: Feb 9, 2003
Homer gets jealous of Flanders and his incredible string of good luck. So he decides to imitate his neighbor and pray to God for good things to happen.
Sure enough Homer starts to have things go his way, but it gets out of hand when he prays for a better house.
By twist of fate, the town church is handed over to Simpsons as their new home, and the churchgoers are evicted. Hell then descends on Springfield and chaos ensues until Homer promises to vacate the church.
Episode 11: Barting Over
Air Date: Feb 16, 2003
When Bart learns that Homer has lost his earnings from a TV commercial he appeared in as a baby, Bart takes Homer to court and is granted emancipation from his parents.
Now a legal adult, Bart moves out of the house and into a downtown apartment, where he befriends Tony Hawk and his gang of skating buddies who live upstairs.
Homer appeals to Tony Hawk to let him win in a skate-off to impress Bart and lure him back home, but Bart finally lets Homer know that he was just looking for Homer to care about his feelings. Homer finally gets it, and the father and son reunite.
Episode 12: I'm Spelling As Fast As I Can
Air Date: Feb 16, 2003
On the first day back to school, Lisa wins a spelling bee and is recruited by a well-known spelling scout, Joe Beadle. Meanwhile, Homer is distraught after Krusty Burger offers a limited-time Krusty rib sandwich, only to promptly remove it from the menu.
Homer temporarily forgets the sandwich by hustling bar patrons around Springfield, challenging them to a spelling duel with Lisa. Once Homer discovers that Krustya 's rib sandwich is scheduled to appear in neighboring Shelbyville, he abandons his scam and travels around the country (a la Deadheads in the a '70s) following the sandwich from town to town.
Upon arriving at the National Spelling Bee, the Chair of the Bee asks Lisa to take a dive and let the much cuter boy win. The Chair tells her that she can go to college for free if she takes the dive. Lisa is about to give in, but her morals take over, only she loses anyway when she spells a word wrong, losing the Bee and the scholarship opportunity.
When she gets home however, the town of Springfield erects a monument to her for accomplishing more than anyone else has in the history of the town.
Episode 13: A Star Is Born Again
Air Date: Mar 2, 2003
When a famous and sultry movie star swoops into Springfield, every mana 's jaw drops. It turns out that she has eyes for none other than Ned Flanders, who has been lonely ever since his wife passed on.
Flanders is the envy of Springfield as they go arm and arm together around town, and Homer is dying to know if they ever did the a deed.a
The movie star eventually tires of Flanders and leaves to return to LA, but Flanders still refuses to tell Homer what he wants to know. Naturally, Homer goes nuts.
Episode 14: Mr. Spritz Goes To Washington
Air Date: Mar 9, 2003
When The Simpsons become fed up with the new flight patterns at the Springfield airport which are sending loud planes over their house all the time, they take a stand and demand action from their congressman.
The politician promptly dies as hea 's hearing their proposal, and the family goes about helping Krusty win his now-vacant House seat and take up their cause in Washington.
Once Krusty is installed in power, he wreaks havoc on the U.S. political system a " but not without getting a Springfield plane rerouting bill passed.
Episode 15: C. E. D'oh
Air Date: Mar 16, 2003
Homer enrolls in a a How to Succeed in Being Youa course and takes a new attitude to work, where he makes suggestions to improve safety at the power plant. When Burns laughs at Homera 's proposals, Homer and Lisa devise a plan to take the plant from him.
After being legally out-maneuvered, Burns signs the plant over to Homer, and Homer becomes the new CEO. With the companya 's future in his hands, Homer begins to make cutbacks to ensure financial stability. He even lays off everyone save himself, but there is no one to monitor the machines now running the place and the plant suffers a major meltdown.
At the eleventh hour, Burns returns to restore order.
Episode 16: 'scuse Me While I Miss The Sky
Air Date: Mar 30, 2003
A British filmmaker comes to Barta 's class to make a documentary on the typical American school, and Barta 's celebrity status is plunged into jeopardy when Nelson receives attention from the filmmaker for stealing hood ornaments.
Moreover, the filmmaker leaves Lisa with feelings of inadequacy, causing her to run out and choose a career in astronomy. Bart begins searching for unique hood ornaments while Lisa, unable to find a dark spot to stargaze, climbs Mt. Springfield. She encounters Professor Frink at the summit, and he teaches her about the problem of light pollution.
Lisa starts a campaign to reduce the amount of light usage in Springfield, but when Chief Wiggum encourages Springfield to double its light usage to fight crime, night becomes day and the town goes a mondo bizarro,a unable to sleep with the constant light.
Lisa finally decides that enough is enough and breaks into the power plant with Bart, overloads the system and plunges the town into total darkness, returning Springfield to normal.
Episode 17: Three Gays Of The Condo
Air Date: Apr 13, 2003
Homer and Marge have a fight when Homer realizes Marge married him because she was pregnant with Bart. He decides to leave the house and tries moving in with Milhousea 's dad.
After not being able to sleep, hea 's eventually taken in by Karl, his old assistant. It turns out that Karl has a flamboyant lifestyle which Homer gets a heavy dose of.
Homer tries to get back together with Marge, but he screws it up and goes out drinking a " heavily. He ends up in the hospital where he and Marge reconcile. Homer realizes that Marge loves him and thata 's all that matters. He moves back home.
Episode 18: Dude, Where's My Ranch?
Air Date: Apr 27, 2003
Homer decides to write an original Christmas carol, and pens a tune called a Flanders is a Jerk.a The song rockets up the charts, and the Simpsons are overwhelmed by the sudden success. They decide to get away from it all and take a restful vacation at a dude ranch.
At the ranch, Homer and Bart befriend a tribe of native Americans. They want a dam removed, to restore running water for their village. Battling a swarm of beavers, Homer and Bart manage to destroy the dam and become honorary members of the tribe.
Meanwhile, Lisa falls for a cowhand named Lukas, who happens to be a " much to Margea 's dismay a " a few years older. Lisaa 's jealousy gets the best of her when she finds that he has girlfriend, and she gets the other girl lost in the woods by giving her bad directions. Eventually, Lisa apologizes for her meddling and she and Lukas part as friends.
Episode 19: Old Yeller-belly
Air Date: May 4, 2003
When a fire breaks out, Homer is trapped beneath an ice sculpture. Santaa 's Little Helper is turns tail and runs away, leaving the family cat to perform the rescue.
The poor dog is banished from the house. While playing alone outside, Santaa 's Little Helper toys with a discarded can of Duff beer. A photojournalist snaps a picture, which inspires the Duff Corporation to name the dog as the new mascot. In exchange, the Corporation showers the Simpsons with wealth.
Out of nowhere, the original owner of Santaa 's Little Helper appears and reclaims the dog. Santaa 's Little Helper is now miserable, so the Simpsons create an elaborate plan. During a Duff Beer publicity event at the beach, Homer pretends to drown. (In reality, he is merely balancing on a keg of beer.)
Once again, Santaa 's Little Helper is afraid to save him. The once adoring public is shocked by the doga 's cowardice. Meanwhile, Homer is attacked by a giant shark. The shark bites the keg of beer, and gets drunk. The inebriated animal floats to the shore, where the crowd is delighted by his antics. In a burst of inspiration, the Duff Corporation fires Santaa 's Little Helper and names the shark as the new mascot.
The doga 's owner wants nothing to do with him any longer, and the Simpsona 's family pet is once again their own.
Episode 20: Brake My Wife, Please
Air Date: May 11, 2003
Homer loses his drivera 's license and Marge is forced to drive him around town. She gets increasingly stressed by having to chauffeur everyone, and she grows angrier and aggressive.
Meanwhile, Homer actually starts to enjoy walking a " but Marge clips him with the car while hea 's crossing the street. Homer and Marge go to therapy together, and the family tries to cheer Marge up by paying attention to her needs and not making her tend to them at all.
Episode 21: The Bart Of War
Air Date: May 18, 2003
When Bart and Milhouse become bored, they head over to Flandersa ' house and wreak havoc.
When theya 're caught in the act, Homer and Marge decide to enroll Bart in the a Pre-Teen Braves,a a club to keep kids off the streets. Homer becomes the a tribal chief,a leading the kids in such traditional Native American activities as eating Buffalo wings and watching football.
Milhouse is separately enrolled in the a Cavalry Kids,a and the two groups feud over which group can do more for charity. The fight escalates as the groups engage in a heated battle to see who can sell more candy.
Episode 22: Moe Baby Blues
Air Date: May 18, 2003
Moe is especially lonely and contemplates suicide. While standing on the side of bridge, about to jump, he accidentally catches Maggie a " who was thrown from the Simpsonsa ' car in a traffic accident. The little baby immediately takes a liking to him.
The Simpsons are pleased, and they offer Moe the opportunity to babysit their youngest. Moe has a chance to explore his softer side with Maggie, but once Homer and Marge get sick of his being around all the time, they forbid Moe from babysitting anymore. When Moe then saves the baby a second time, Homer promises Moe that hea 'll bring Maggie by the bar more often.